R.I.P. Penny

So, it's over.

The Canadian penny is no more.

As of Monday, the Royal Canadian Mint no longer pumps out the little copper coin^* that weighs down my pockets and fills the dish on my dresser. It seems, in Canada, that a penny saved is time well wasted.

Other terms and phrases that will phase out, along with rotary-dial telephones, Beta video cassettes, and smoking in doctors' offices will include the following:

• Penny loafers
• A penny for your thoughts
• Penny Lane is in my ears and in my eyes...
• Pennies from Heaven
• (Knock knock knock)... Penny... (knock knock knock)... Penny... (knock knock knock)... Penny
• Find a penny, pick it up, then all day you'll have good luck

Somewhere in my boxes of things I never look at any more, I have a booklet that holds pennies of every year from 1919 to some time in the late '70s. That's when I got bored of collecting them and became interested in other things.

Like girls.

R.I.P., penny. You will colour our wishing wells and fountains no more.

If you have any pennies that you'd like to get rid of, Ottawa City Hall is collecting them at the security desk. Proceeds will go to the Ottawa Food Bank.

^* Actually, the last penny was minted in May, 2012. I blame the Mayans.