There was a time when I would have a barber that I was dedicated to and would be there for me whenever I was in need of a trim. That hair cutter was tied to that shop and wasn't about to go anywhere.
These days, I seem to be forever in search of a good hairdresser, even if I commit to them.
The first person to cut my hair, after my mom, was a guy named Joe, who worked at a barber shop just a few minute's walk from my house on Bowhill Avenue, in Nepean. The shop was in a shopping plaza on the corner of Merivale Road and Meadowlands Drive, where there was a Dominion grocery store, a K-Mart, a TD Bank, and the Living Lighting store, as well as a Brewer's Retail outlet (later, called The Beer Store) and Gow's Chinese take-out restaurant (I later worked with the daughter of Gow's, Evelyn, at the camera store in the Merivale Mall, but that's another story).
I remained a loyal customer to Joe, from as young as 5 (maybe younger), walking down with cash in my hand that my mother gave me. I never had to tell Joe how to cut my hair. He always remembered, from the first time my mom took me into the shop and supervised his first cut, and as I grew older he'd modify my hair to suit my age and the style at the time.
I had no complaints.
In my late teens, Joe retired. At the same time, I was working in the Merivale Mall, at a paint and wallpaper store, and a newly opened shop was just a few doors down: Hair World.
Not knowing who would be best-suited to cut my hair, I took the first-available person for my first visit. It was a young woman, maybe only a couple of years older than me.
Valerie. Val.
Sitting in the chair, I told Valerie to "just make me look good." She gave me a very good hair cut, and when she washed my hair and massaged my scalp with her long fingernails, I almost drooled. (Several of my co-workers, over the years, who also visited Val, agreed that she gave the best scalp massages. It wasn't sexual—get your minds out of the gutter!)
For nearly 15 years, Val was my hair stylist. She cut my hair for my college graduation. She cut my hair for my wedding. And she cut my hair just before DW and I headed to South Korea, to teach English.
When I returned to Canada, more than two years later, I returned to Hair World, where Val was still making people look good. Though I was living in Barrhaven and the Merivale Mall was a bit of a drive, I was loyal.
But Val had changed. One of the first things she told me, when we reunited, was that she and her husband had divorced and that she had become a Born-Again Christian.
Val's religious beliefs didn't bother me. I strongly feel that everyone has a right to his or her beliefs, and whether I agreed with those beliefs or not, I would defend anyone's right to them. As long as they didn't press those beliefs upon me.
Throughout my appointments with Val, the conversation seemed to revolve around her faith and God and the values that she held dear. I would smile, nod when she wasn't trimming me, but otherwise be silent. On one occasion, she asked me about my belief in God, and I had to be vague.
I don't remember what I said but I somehow escaped telling her that the existence of God to me is moot: I try to live by the Golden Rule that you treat others the way you want to be treated. I certainly didn't tell her that I don't really believe in God, but that if God exists, I don't need him/her in my life to be a good person.
If God exists, s/he has some explaining to do. But that's another story.
It was beginning to get uncomfortable visiting Val because of the awkward conversations, but what did it for me was that Val no longer washed my hair after cutting it. There were dedicated people who would wash customers' hair.
And not one of them gave a scalp massage as good as Val.
After a couple of visits, I started looking for another barber.
A POTD at a First Choice shop. |
A new barber shop opened in Barrhaven. The owner gave me very good haircuts but as soon as business picked up and he started hiring other barbers, he stopped cutting hair and just ran the business. And the barbers that he hired ranged from mediocre to awful.
DW recommended that I try her salon and I got an appointment with someone whose name matched my wife's. Once again, I got a really good haircut and started visiting this stylist on a regular basis. When she moved to another salon, about a year or so later, she quietly let me know where she was headed, so that I could follow her there.
Less than a year later, my stylist moved on to another shop and I never heard from her again.
Once again, without a good barber, I reached out to my social media friends for a good recommendation, and I was directed to a shop near Hintonburg. It was a long way from Barrhaven but was somewhat between home and the office, and I could make the visit work.
My first barber, Anna, did a great job. But in less than a year, she had moved on. In fact, she had left while I had a scheduled appointment with her and I didn't find out that she had left until I arrived for my cut.
The receptionist apologized but said that I had been set up with another stylist, Jessica. I thought, why not? I'm here anyway.
Jessica gave me the best haircut in years—possibly, the best cut since the days of Valerie, before I left for Korea. Jessica was talkative, interesting, and remembered conversations we had had during previous appointments.
She even set up a job interview for one of my kids.
For nearly two years, I looked forward to my next appointments. And then, Jessica decided to leave the shop.
Jessica reached out to me and told me where she had moved, but by the time I was ready to contact her for my next haircut, she had moved back to her previous shop, so we acted like nothing had happened.
One of the best haircuts that Jessica gave me was just before I headed on a trip, in 2019, to return to South Korea. You can see the great work that she did in my YouTube video.
Shortly after I returned from South Korea, Jessica moved to another shop. Again, she contacted me about the new location, but she was in the heart of downtown, where parking was expensive, if you could find an available spot. It broke my heart but I had to say goodbye.
I continued to visit the shop, using other barbers, but I never had a haircut nor the rapport that I had had with Jessica, and eventually left.
I contacted Jessica, about a year later, when one of my kids was desperate for a haircut. I wanted to see if she would be willing to cut women's hair (she was experienced in cutting men's hair when she worked at the previous shop). But she had since moved, again: this time, to Casselman, about an hour east of Ottawa.
Way, way too far.
I visited a new-ish salon, in Barrhaven, and had a good barber, but after a couple of visits, he moved on.
During the pandemic, I let my hair grow long, opting to cut it, myself, with some help from DW for the back. But my hair looked awful. It was a good thing that I had to keep to my home for most of the time.
When things started opening up, I tried another barber shop. When I called to book an appointment, for as soon as possible, I was given two names of available barbers: I chose Dora (it was the first word that Kid 1 spoke, as a baby, after her favourite TV show character).
Dora gave me the best haircut since Jessica, so I continued to book appointments with her. I only got four appointments before she disappeared.
I've been going through the other barbers, trying to get one that I was happy with, but I've come away with cuts that have been just okay. Six weeks ago, I had a cut that I really didn't like, so I continued trying other stylists.
Yesterday, I saw the name of someone that I haven't met, yet, and hoped that this one would be the replacement for Dora that I was looking for. But when I showed up for my appointment, this barber was still backed up with her current client, and I was asked if I was specifically waiting for her.
Being polite, I said, "no," so I was promised the next-available barber.
I got the person who cut my hair six weeks ago. Again, I left the shop with a cut that I didn't like (even though I directed this person a couple of times).
It's hard to find a good barber. And when you find one, it seems hard to keep them. I always wonder if I should have stayed with Val, and maybe, politely, asked her not to talk religion during our appointments. Hair World is gone from the Merivale Mall and I have no idea where Val is, today.
I could have followed Jessica to the downtown shop but there's just no way that I would have followed her to Casselman.
And where did Dora go? Is she off, exploring?
My ability to retain a good barber is severely lacking. Any recommendation, folks?
Until then, I'll just cross my fingers that when I need a haircut again, I'll get the person I was supposed to see, last night, and that she can give me a decent cut.
Stay tuned.
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